His 3rd birthday and then on to Xmas.....

His birthday was great. Just family, at Papa's Pizza again, and he got spoiled rotten. Again. But the best part is, Mommy and Daddy got to do some of the spoiling this year! The theme was Spider-Man and Mommy helped Nana put up a bunch of Spider-Man decorations and Nana made awesome little cupcakes with web designs in the frosting and all his presents from Nana and Papa and Mommy and Daddy were exquisitely wrapped in Spidey paper. Auntie Angel chased him through the giant hamster tube play equipment in Papa's play room. Better her than me! (I was impressed!) I'm not even going to try to list his shwag but it was a good haul. I was really pleased by the things that the wife and I were able to get for him. Awesome birthday for an awesome little Monster.

And then, after his birthday party we went downtown to Pioneer Courthouse Square and saw the big tree and then we went up to the Zoo to see the Zoo Lights and ride the train! That was a crazy experience but ultimately worth it. Zoo Lights, on a Saturday night two weeks before Christmas is a very, very busy place. The type of crowd that I avoid like the plague. But I stayed optimistic because it was something that I wanted Baron to see and despite the just-one-degree-above-freezing temperature (and the fact that I was wearing shorts, like I always do.) and the long wait in a couple of different lines it was a lot of fun. For this stodgy ol' codger it's alotta fluff and brou-ha-ha but with Baron with us we look at the whole spectacle from a different perspective and it's suddenly new and amazing and fun again. It's a novelty but it's also a local holiday tradition and that is part of what the spirit of the season is all about; celebrating the novelty of old traditions. I'll have to put up some pictures.

Our first haunted corn maze. Yikes.

The wife and I have really been looking forward to this holiday season. Baron is, of course, older now and we really think that he'll "get" the holidays and get into the spirit of things. Our hope is to decorate what little space we have with whatever little decoration(s) we can buy and really embrace the crazyness and really point out all of the decorations and symbols of each holiday and explain everything. And sing silly holiday songs. ESPECIALLY CHRISTMAS SONGS!!!!! Love, love, luv, LOVE me some Christmas songs. Year 'round if I could get away with it, but I can't. It makes "people", (my wife) highly irritable to hear Christmas songs in March or July or September. I don't get it but I gotta accept it.

Anyway, the first holiday on the docket is every bodies favorite candy fest, HALLOWEEN!!! The wife and I talked about getting pumpkins and what the boy would wear and what we might wear and going to the pumpkin patch and the corn maze and all that stuff that makes October worth putting on a calendar. Nana and Papa took us to the corn maze and it was really fun. By all rights the whole experience should have been a disaster but every time things looked like they were stacked against us karma would come up and turn things around for us. From the get-go I don't think anybody knew it was a haunted corn maze. Haunted corn maze's are for adults and teenagers who think that a spooky corn maze is a good place to make out with their special some one. Not for little kids. It didn't really dawn on me until we were in line to get in and the scary music was loud and the fog machine was firing up that Baron wasn't going to be into it. But we were there, we might as well try. What's a little terror? For all the noise and excitement Baron did really well waiting in line. We also did not realize that the maze wouldn't be opening until after dark so we waited in line for about forty five minutes before we started moving forward. Then, a group of young, evilish teeny boppers that were loitering on the other side of the ropes broke through and piled into the line right in front of us. I became almost irrationally mad at these pukey punks but wasn't gonna make a deal about it, especially in Baron's presence. We moved up about thirty feet and I heard them as they realized that they needed tickets to get into the corn maze, which they did not have. Ah.. innocence. Where everything is free and their are no repercussions until they slap you in the face. So, they stepped aside while we went in. The scary clown gave us the rundown, no touching, no leaving through the entrance, no tearing through the corn in a flight of gut wrenching terror. Baron made it twenty feet in on his own before he jumped into mommies arms. After a few different people in scary costume jumped out at us from the corn we decided this might be a bad idea and that we should find the exit. But see, here's the thing; WE WERE IN A CORN MAZE!! The whole point is to TRY and FIND the exit and it's not supposed to be easy. I've been in a few corn mazes' and I've never been through one in a short amount of time. I'd never tried it in the dark. I began to fear more and more that we were going to be stuck in that maze for at least an hour, at best. Nana led the charge by flashing her nice camera in the eyes of people who jumped out at her, as she giggled in a frantic fashion. That part was pretty brilliant. She actually used her camera's flash as an effective defensive weapon.

We had come around a familiar section of corn that looked a lot like the other sections of corn we had passed in the dark when somebody tripped on something and stopped to inspect said item. Turns out it was one of Baron's rain boots that must have fallen off when we were in that section of maze before. We didn't even know he was missing a boot! Score!!

But here's the crazy part; we were out of there within thirty to forty minutes. I couldn't believe it. We should've been chasing our tails much longer than that. Not that I'm complaining, far from it. We just really beat the odds on that one. And when we emerged triumphantly from the corn maze EXIT the line to enter the corn maze had grown into a giant serpent that coiled around the entire farm area and their was a line of cars trying to get into the parking lot. Now, that's crazy, but can you imagine what that maze must've been like later that evening? Hundreds of hairless apes shoulder to shoulder in a dusty dark corn maze. Imagine the percentage of those apes that were drunk or in the corn to get drunker! That, in every way possible, sounds more frightening and disturbing and grotesque than whatever some stoners in hockey masks could whip up to fit the limpest definition of 'scary'. Ewwwww..... No, no, we had an excellent time in the maze, all things considered. Baron was scared, of course, but it could have been a really bad scene. I liked it and when I'm older and grayer I'll look back on the whole occasion fondly.

Mommy had to work on Halloween evening and Baron is going through a phase where he's really scared or pretends to be scared so I didn't have any expectations for trick or treating. We don't live in a neighborhood for it, bunch of stuck up old pirates. I dressed Baron in his Batman pants and shirt with velcroed cape, grabbed a Spider-Man bucket and hit the streets. We walked all around the hood, enjoying the lovely, sunny fall weather. A couple of places were decorated but admiring their creativity from a short distance was as close as we were going to get to their front door. When all was said and done and we returned home he poured out his bucket on the floor and enjoyed the spoils of his holiday; Two rocks and four leaves.
I love that kid.
So friggin much.

Luv dem berries

We just went for a little walk behind the house here and the blackberries are gettin nice and ripe. I can't tell you how many years it's been since I've grabbed a berry off of a vine but he pointed to them and said "Boo! Boo!", which is his way of saying 'blue berries'. He loves blue berries!! So, I chose a nice, big, ripe blackberry and handed it to him. He looked at it for a second and then trepidatiously brought it to his lips and gave it the tinest of nibbles. He considered the flavor for a moment before he voraciously shoved the remainder into his ravenous maw. They passed the taste test, to be sure! So, I figured if they're okay for him they should be okay for me, right? I chose for myself another nice, big, ripe berry and popped into my mouth and immediately spit it right back out as my eyes watered and crossed at the sourness of what I had just sampled. I do not like sour. Blech!! I really hope his tasted better than mine! He wanted many, many more but we were on our way back home to change his diaper. Something about the majesty of the great outdoors makes him load his pants every time we go outside. It's irritating sometimes. I doesn't matter if I change his diaper right before we head out the door, as soon as he hits that fresh air he drops a lethal stink bomb. It's time for me, as his parent, to look forward to the day when he has a child and gets to experience the joy of diaper changing. Vengance is a dirty, stinky thing. As it should be!!

All about poop. !

We bought him a little trainer toilet seat, some pull up training pants and some Pixar character underwear for reward/incentive. Here we go! We (as in all three of us) are ready for this. The time is now. I know he has the ability to figure it out, but I've been wondering if the short gut is gonna make it hard for him to know when it's time to go potty. Or something. I don't want to go into specifics but I just like to cover all the possible outcomes. When dealing with poo it's good to have people with their lights on all the exits.

Let's talk about this

He's said please and thank you! Said them! With his mouth! Earlier this morning we were in the car and I had just put in Metallica's Master Of Puppets and he instantly raised his hand in the air and pumped his index finger like he was shooting the metal up to the sky! He's never been able to rock the horns, he's always used his pointer finger. But today he watched my hand pound the air and he studied it for a second and then he tried really hard to get his pinky up and keep his other fingers down. But....he....just......couldn't....quite..do...it... He could get his middle finger tucked but that darned ol' ring finger just kept popping out and snugglin up to that kinky pinky. He started to get frustrated. I told him we'd work on it later and everything was going to be okay, he'd rock the horns like a metal monster in no time 'tall. I could tell he knew what he wanted his fingers to do, he just doesn't have control of them completely. Yet. It's moments like that, when I can see his gears grinding and turning and see him figure something out (or not), I find so fascinating and unbelievable rewarding. And most times humbling, but a smiling kind of humbling! He's just so fun. Each day is a new word or problem solved or area explored. He watched Mickey's Clubhouse for the first time and he liked it so we watched a couple of episodes and this morning it was on when we all got up REAL early and he knew which mouseketool to use at the right time and all that stuff. Really interactind with the program in a positive way and actually getting something out of it for his betterment. We both saw it and looked at each other like, 'I'll be damned, did he really just do that?'. His lion roar with hands clawing at the air is priceless. Him thinking that everything is MINE, MINE, MINE? nnnnot so much. Boxes of food at Safeway, toys at Target, Ollies Elmo, my food, EVERYTHING is 'MINE'!! His least attractive characteristic at the moment. Oh, and throwing things. Not really in a protest, tantrum type of way but more in a mischeivious, playful way and the kid has an amazing arm. He can really throw! He's gonna make his parents rich someday.

The wonders of speech therapy

Sarah, a speech therapist through Early Intervention, has visited us four times now and the benefits of her expertise are already becoming evident. She stays for about a half hour and just shows us a few things in sign language and plays/works with Baron. He LOVES her. He wants to show her everything as soon as she walks in the door and really wants to take her into his room so Daddy and Mommy aren't interfering with their time. He now knows the signs for 'please','more','go','hungry' and can understand quite a few others. Sarah said that he's taking to signing faster than any toddler she's worked with. Not only that, but signing is helping him understand words and their meanings and that understanding is helping him speak more. He says quite a few words now and he says a new one every couple of days. It's so exciting. He and I almost had a short conversation on Thursday. Our first!
Boy loves to dance. He has a couple of favorite kids shows and all of them are music based. Wow Wow Wubbzy, Fresh Beat Band, Yo Gabba Gabba, and live concert footage make him MOVE! The other day he busted out The Disco Roll dance that Jack Black performed on Yo Gabba Gabba. Killed me!!!! The other day he let me watch John Legend and The Roots on Austin City Limits and he actually liked it. I couldn't believe it. He sat through a few Pantera videos on Youtube. But, as much as he loves to listen to Pantera I think the visual of the band was a bit much for his impressionable little brain to handle.
And a slightly funny development; he's afraid of monkeys. It's because of the monkeys in Toy Story 3. The only things in this world he's afraid of (other than not getting his way). Whenever he sees a monkey on TV he runs to us and buries his face so the evil monkeys can't see him. Precious.

He's just self concsious of his personal odor.

He demonstrated his gift for mimicry today by opening 'my' drawer in the bathroom, grabbing my deodorant, unzipping his sleeper and applying my deodorant to his underarms. He is just so cute. And now he smells pretty good too.
He babbles all of the time now. He has an actual vocabulary that is growing, finally. He says 'shake' when we make his bottle because we always make it a game, building the anticipation of each part of the process until we screw the cap on aaaaannnnnnddd shake-shake-shake-shake-shake-shake-shake-shake-shake-shake etc..... and he just loves it. He says 'kitty', or at least an understandable variation.

He just walked up to me and pulled up my shirt and stuck hid finger in my belly button, which he KNOWS I cannot stand. Then he unzipped his sleeper and pushed his own belly button and said 'OWWW!' in perfect mockery and mimicry of his over exaggerated father. Cute kid. Can't wait for him to get a job.

An appetite like a shark!!

He has been eating so much the last few days! It's so unlike him. Today Papa took us out to breakfast at Elmers and he all but devoured Mommy's steak. Then for lunch he consumed a good portion of MY cold pizza. Cold!! And he's had pizza several times in the last four or so days. But cold pizza? I still can't believe it. I mean, I don't know why I like cold pizza. Weird. He feels heavier. I'm not going to be able to hold him much longer. I'm expecting a big 'ol growth spurt in the next few days.
Great.

Where did Spider Man's head go?

Baron woke me up at six this morning, fully armed and ready for action. We started watching some cartoons while I tried to get my eyes to open and after my lids finally parted I looked down and saw Baron playing with a headless Spider Man. The first thought to penetrate the morning fog in my mind was that he had swallowed Spider man's head, which gave me a little panic at first but then I remembered that he swallows most of his food without chewing so worst case scenario would be me finding a very unhappy Spider man head in his next diaper. Uhm.... ick. But then he was whining a bit and limping a little. Hhmmm... So, I picked him up and felt his foot through his sleeper, checking for anything that could be the culprit and sure enough, lodged between his big toe and the next toe was a very Spider Man-head-like ball. I unzipped his sleeper and dug out the head and sent him on his destructive way, none the worse for wear. He does this quite often now, taking Mommy's keys, name tag or various plastic cards from her purse and stuffing them into his sleeper. Sometimes it's the snack that I THOUGHT he had eaten (no wonder it's hard to get him to gain weight!), or maybe a small toy of some kind. He's like a box of Cracker Jacks; always a prize inside!! I can't wait for the day when he tries to stuff the cat into his sleeper. THAT'LL be a hoot.

Spider Man saves the day!

I am such a proud Daddy. Last week Baron fell in love with Spider Man. Elmo? Elmo who? I thought I'd never be rid of that little red monster. But wait, it gets better. He loves Wolverine, too! Seriously! Is he or is he not my son? Papa joined us at Toys R Us and we played there for an hour or so and Papa wanted to treat the little man to a new toy (or two) and Baron chose the three pack of Spider Man and His Amazing Friends! Shame on you if you don't know that Spider Man's Amazing Friends are Firestar and Iceman, from the early eightied cartoon show. I was blown away to see these three figures in one package. I loved this cartoon as a kid. LOVED IT!! So, that night I went through the DVR menu and found, you guessed it, episodes of Spider Man and His Amazing Friends! I can't believe they still play this cartoon, it is sooooo dated! But Baron loves it and we've watched the same two episodes a dozen times already. And I recorded a few different X-Men and Wolverine cartoons and he's cycling his way through those now. I do realize that these cartoons may not have the educational value of Sesame Street, but Baron plans on being a super hero when he gets older so this really is best for him at this point. Besides, Daddy's right there beside him when he watches these shows and I make my own sound effects and tell him what's going on and who's who and try to impress upon his little mind the values inherent in what the heroes are trying to do. Seriously, anything can be educational if you explain it to your child from the proper point of view. And we play with his action figures when we watch the programs, mimicking their exploits and adventures. And, if that isn't enough, I put a few Spider Man and Wolverine stickers on our table that the tv sits on and he'll point to them and I'll exuberantly call out their names or I'll call out their names and he'll point to the right one every time. So proud.
And he's getting smarter and smarter every day. He stills doesn't talk much but if we're looking through one of his many, many books and I call out a shape, color or character, he'll point to the proper one every time. He knows his stuff and it's just further proof that when he does finally start to talk it's not going to be a word here or there but whole sentences and paragraphs. So proud.

What an awesome little guy!

. I was worried a month or so ago that he was going to be a real bratty kid. The signs were there and I was preparing myself for dealing with him in a state of near constant tantrum (his tantrums, not mine!). But he's really come around this month and has started doing things and helping out in ways that make me so much more than proud. Mommy has taught him to throw away his dirty diapers in the trash can after each changing and he's so happy to do it. Whenever he drops his bottle and we ask him to pick it up he'll promptly pick it up and set it on the table, right side up. When we say it's time for bed he'll grab his blanket and head for the room, usually before we are actually ready for him to do so. However, getting him to STAY in bed can be a different story but I'm trying to sing his praises here so we won't go into that at the moment. He pets the kitty very nicely. He's never really been very rough with her, hasn't grabbed hand fulls of hair or things like that. But I believe that he's aware of her ferocity and recognizes her as something not to be trifled with. He does like to test his boundaries and do things that he darn well KNOWS he's not supposed to do, but he will stop when told to and that makes me very happy. It's little things like these that he continues to do on a daily basis that give me so much hope that our son is going to be a good kid.
But, I'm no fool. Time will reveal the truth.
And we'll love him either way.
We had an early morning play session at Clackamas Mall yesterday morning. He usually needs a major diaper change after the long drive from dropping Mommy off at work in Hillsboro to the Mall in Clackamas and I'm not ashamed to admit that I enjoy throwing that first nasty diaper of the day into the Mall's trash can instead of ours here at home. Yesterday I let him play with my phone while I did the deed and it took less than thirty seconds for him to activate the camera on my phone and he started taking pictures of me while I was changing his diaper. Gah, I love this kid!! He already exhibits far more technical proficiency than his old man has ever possessed.
Yesterday was our first daytime Daddy Play Group! It was great! It's almost like a completely different play group because both of us have way more energy at 10 a.m. than we do at 6 p.m. so I can keep up with him better and he's more involved with the group instead of going off to be the Little Lone Ranger like he usually does. The plan is to have the first three Fridays of the month at the community center and the fourth Friday of the month will be a field trip somewhere like OMSI or something similar. How cool is that? We can't wait to go back to OMSI!!
Ooops, he says it's time for Daddy to stop blogging and start engaging!! Later!

Juggling the lung butter

He's had a nasty cough for the last couple of days. Deep down, gurgling, raspy coughs that make me want to put a rag on a stick and swab it down his throat to get at the junk that's plaguing him. Sounds like a jet trying to take off in a giant vat of gooey molasses. Poor lil' monster. It doesn't matter though, that nasty cough can't slow him down any more than anything else that life has thrown at him so far. Just one more pitiful obstacle to be pushed aside on his way to world conquest. Sometimes he'll cough and stop to put value to the taste then continue forward with a look of contempt for a sickness that could do no better than that.
We visited Ollie and Andy last week for a little while. it's so good for all four of us when we hang out. The little ones love the interaction, even if they seem to spend most of their time trying to take toys from each other. On this last visit Baron found something that may be more powerful than he; hugs. Yes, hugs. Adorable little Ollie approached Baron several times with his arms spread out and tried to give Bam Bam Baron a bear hug. I could tell by the look on Baron's face that he now has a definition for cooties. He wanted no part of that action. Priceless.
A time honored law among men is that you do not talk with other men in public restrooms. That's just the way it is. No "hello"'s. No "hey, that shirt looks good on you". No "do you have an extra hair tie I can have?". If a man has a heart attack or falls and hurts himself in a public men's room he had better hope he's got enough charge left in the battery to make it out the door or he will be on his own until he is face to face with his maker. Unless a man is in the men's room with his child. Then we become a gaggle of chatty Kathie's. It's very weird. Baron and I were in the restroom at Target a few days ago and we had to wait for our turn at the changing table, which NEVER happens, and then another father came in with his own dirty monster to change and we just started shootin the stuff like it's not a forbidden activity. We laughed! Kids, they change all the rules.

Baron takes on 2011!

Crazy, crazy kid. He has a mountain of toys now. A monument of blinking, chirping, whistling, whirring plastic things. After a wonderful holiday season I find myself glad that I packed some of his toys away a month ago in anticipation of just such a situation. The funny thing is, he likes 'em all. He's still getting around to the shwag he received at his birthday and now he has even MORE and he really does get around to most of them. Papa gave him a set of lazer combat remote control vehicles and he's geekin out over those. He doesn't quite get how to make them go forward or backward, but he sure knows where the lazer trigger is. He will keep firing the that thing off over and over and over again until that 'beew-beew-beew' is the only thing I can hear. Over. And. Over.
Thanx again, Papa.
But yeah, who do you think Papa really bought that for? Yeah, that's what I'm thinkin' too.
I can't express how happy I am that he will sit still through his favorite book without going off to do something else. Really. I just wondered there for a while if he would ever slow down for a book. But. Buuuut, and I hate to complain, but if I have to read 'It's not easy being big' with Big Bird and Elmo more than four times in a row again, I might hide it somewhere for a little while. It's the only book he wants to sit through. And he will sit still for every page, pointing at the different characters while I say their names as I read the story and he really loves it. But as soon as that last page is flipped over he demands a re-read or else. Ugh. Soon.
He's full on testing his boundaries now. He understands what we say very well. He knows of the few things that will get him in trouble. Like using his drum sticks on the wall. So, sometimes he will grab his drum sticks and run over to the wall, look at Mommy or myself, and raise his arms in preparation for the strike that he knows should not be struck. And sure enough, if we make eye contact, he more than likely will hit it, just once, and as soon as we raise our voice or start to get up he'll throw the sticks one direction and run off in the opposite direction. He doesn't do this all the time, but it's a few things like this and as a group it seems like he's testing us in one way or another most of the time. Admittedly, it probably doesn't help to dissuade him when I see that look of inquisitive defiance in his eyes and I can't help but grin. He's a tiger in a small cage, wanting to go out and find something new to pounce on. We were expecting to raise a small, fragile child that we would have to protect from the world and instead we have a monkey minded wrecking ball information sponge that we have to protect the world from. Can't wait to take him hiking. Let him take down a deer or maybe a mountain goat.
Gets me thinking about what sports he will be interested in and what he'll be good at when he gets older. I expect that he's going to be very competitive and strong. Like, gorilla stong. He's already sprinting at cheetah speed and he can climb anything, even well cleaned glass. So what will he want to play? I was never into sports. I did it because it was expected, not because I wanted to. I think Baron is going to be the opposite. I hope so! How else am I going to live vicariously through him?
Heh.